Our Current (Completely Unsustainable) Schedule
January 2022: me, Hannah, and the cat
It’s been awhile since I’ve done a schedule related post. Here’s my last day in the life post from May of 2019 (oh how things have changed!).
Rather than do a day in the life post from a specific day, I thought I’d share what our current general schedule is looking like these days. I’m not sharing this schedule because it’s amazing and working really well for us, I’m sharing it because it feels kind of terrible!
If I wasn’t quitting my job and we weren’t planning to move we would absolutely need to make some major adjustments to this schedule. However, because Mike and I both know this is temporary, we’re making it work for the time being. Mainly because we’re hoping that Mike can turn his remote part-time position into full time when I’m done work.
7:00a(ish): We use Hannah as our alarm clock and she’s up, on average, around 7:00a. Some days it’s way earlier, like 5:30a (though that’s thankfully becoming less frequent), other days she’ll sleep until 7:45a. More often than not 7:00a is when we’re getting up. After she’s up, Mike changes her diaper and then I do her first nursing session of the day.
7:30a: I get ready for the day, Mike makes breakfast while Hannah plays in the kitchen. If Ellie isn’t up yet we’ll wake her up.
8:15a: Mike, Ellie, and Hannah leave for school (this is the time they aim for, most days it’s later). I start work if I haven’t already.
8:45a: Mike and Hannah get home from taking Ellie to school. When they actually get home depends on whether or not they take a longer walk or stop and talk with neighbors. If I’m at a good pausing point, I’ll talk with Mike about how drop off went and then head back to work while he feeds Hannah solids and plays. Mostly I’m grading, meeting with students, or doing course prep. Because I’m leaving in June I’m spending minimal time on research.
10:00a: I nurse Hannah again. She falls asleep really easily while nursing so I’ve tried to distance nursing sessions from nap time. Initially, I tried to do work while nursing but now I use this time to take a break. After she’s done nursing I hand her back to Mike and wrap up my morning work session.
11:00a: Mike starts work and hands Hannah off to me. Her naps are still pretty terrible and it seems to help if we push her a full 4 hours from wake up to first nap (any shorter and she screams during put down). I start the nap time process around this time and pause work, though I am still checking email to see if anyone has any urgent needs (they never do).
11:15a: Hannah goes down for nap #1. If I’m lucky I’ll get 30 minutes (though we have gotten 2, 1-hour naps this past week so maybe she’s finally growing out of the short nap phase). If there’s something quick and easy related to work that I can do, I’ll do it. If not, I’ll do something quick/easy related to our upcoming move.
11:45a: Hannah gets up. We hang out in Ellie’s bedroom while she slowly shakes off the sleepiness. Hannah likes looking at all of the brightly colored decorations in Ellie’s room while we sit on the bed. We slowly make our way down the hall, into the front room and play with some toys.
12:30p: I feed Hannah solids and then get lunch ready for myself. Lunch is followed up by more play time.
1:00p: Mike has a 15 minute break and we check-in on how work is going for him and what Hannah’s been up to. Then it’s clean up and play time for me and Hannah.
2:00p: I nurse Hannah again before we have to go pick up Ellie. I’ll do a quick work email check before we head out to see if there’s anything that needs my immediate attention.
2:15p: My alarm goes off to remind me that we need to leave to pick up Ellie from school soon. I slowly get Hannah ready to leave the house (though it never takes me that long, so we are usually just doing more play time at this point).
2:40p: Hannah and I leave to go get Ellie. The school is right down the street from us and it’s nice to get in a mandatory walk outside once a day, rain or shine.
3:00p: Ellie, Hannah, and I get home. I get Hannah ready for her second nap (which will sometimes happen, other times not).
3:15p: Hannah (hopefully) goes down for nap #2. I get Ellie’s school stuff cleaned up (lunch emptied out, papers out of her bag) while checking in with Ellie about her day.
3:30p: Mike is done work and we switch roles. If Hannah is still screaming, Mike will try and hold her for a nap, though that’s working less and less now. Otherwise, he’ll check in with Ellie, do some general clean up and then start getting ready for the evening/dinner routine. I start work again, though by this time I’m usually exhausted. If I don’t have a meeting during the 4 o’clock hour I may take a quick nap to refresh my brain.
3:45p: If Hannah fell asleep for nap #2 she’s usually waking up right about now. Mike gets her up. Depending on the weather, he might do something outside with the girls, which gives me some quiet/alone time in the house.
5:00p: I take a break from work to nurse Hannah. Then I head back into the office (which is now doubling as our bedroom because Hannah has taken over our actual bedroom).
7:00p: I do my final nursing session of the day and eat at least half of my dinner before I head into office hours if it’s an office hours night. If it’s not an office hours night I’ll hold off on dinner until Hannah is in bed.
7:15p: Mike puts Hannah to bed around this time and if I’m available I’ll say goodnight.
7:30p: I have office hours for my courses 2 nights a week that last for an hour. If I don’t have office hours I’ll take a break for dinner around this point.
8:30p: On office hours nights I’ll eat the rest of my dinner after I’m done at 8:30p and continue work for another hour or so depending on what I’m working on. Mike and Ellie start the bedtime routine and he lets me know when she’s ready for me to say goodnight.
9:30p: I sign off from work for the night and then dive into anything personal I want to work on (e.g., the move, the blog, our budget, etc.)
11:30p: I head to bed around this time, though it’s usually past midnight by the time I close my eyes.
Essentially, I’ve got a ~3ish hour work block (max) in the morning (split up by nursing and saying goodbye for school drop off), a 4.5 hour block of parenting (and some light work), and then a ~6ish hour work block (max) in the evening (split up with nursing, dinner, bedtime, and maybe a nap). I really do not like switching back and forth between tasks, especially between things that are so different, so all the starting/stopping is really challenging. Mike doesn’t work on Fridays and has a shorter day on Mondays, so I do get a little more focused time on those days. The late afternoon/evening are also terrible times of day for thoughtful/focused work (at least for me!). I’ve adjusted somewhat, but I’m looking forward to the day when I no longer have to force myself through the afternoon/evening slump.
I’ve blocked off my schedule during the time when I’m with Hannah and Mike is working so that no one schedules a meeting with me. I will attend larger meetings if they overlap with Mike’s work time, but anything where I need to give my undivided attention is really difficult with a really active baby. If I wasn’t still working 100% remotely this schedule wouldn’t work! And if I was planning to stay at my job and go up for tenure we’d probably have Mike return to full time stay at home dad life instead of continuing all the juggling.
That’s what life is looking like for us these days!